Being On Purpose

Not long ago, I had a brilliant moment of clarity. I believed that I had found my true calling and purpose in life. That afternoon, I walked around elated and everything in my world was fresh and exciting. I sat on my back porch with an iced tea and the water in the pond, rippling in the gentle breeze, seemed almost magical. I felt so blessed that day because I was finally in charge of my life!

Then, everything seemed to start going wrong. I tore my workout pants and my car engine light came on and the mechanic bill was $320. I had the car washed while it was being serviced and two days later, it had several bird droppings on it. Then, I had to deliver bad news to a colleague.

I was strained and felt that the world was closing in on me. How could so many things be going wrong so quickly? Why was the world working against me? How could I have felt so good just five days earlier and now I felt so down? Would I ever get to a place where life would just feel good? I felt like I had gone from being in charge to being totally swallowed up and bullied by life.

And, then I got a "thank you" email. It was simple and direct, but its message was a blow to my self-pity. It reminded me that, despite my life's disorder, I was living a life of purpose. I was "being" a person who adds value. I was contributing love, kindness, knowledge, and understanding to my loved ones, to my friends, and to myself.

In that moment, the angle from which I viewed my recent life muddles shifted. My sense of "in-chargeness" returned. I saw that I had control of who I am and what I do with my life. And, the way I respond to life is intrinsically tied to how I view my life's purpose.

Tearing my workout pants in front of other people at the gym suddenly seemed very funny and I realized that I was lucky my car engine check light came on when I was at home. It also occured to me that for several days I had been enjoying the sound of birds singing in the morning. So, the lesson learned was that how I am "being" is the ultimate determinant of the amount of joy I get from life.

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