Lack of Motivation #2Recently, I have begun to notice that people are becoming more and more impatient. Everyone wants what they want, and they want it right now! People want the house, the spouse, the kids, and the promotion all at once and right away! There seems to be this new expectation that everyone can make their dreams come true on the very first try. And, if the first try doesn't result in success, then your lack of motivation to try again becomes almost insurmountable.
In my opinion, something has gotten off track. For me, being good at things has always taken a lot of practice. It is hard to think of an example of something that I am good at that I mastered on the first try. Sure, there were times when I got lucky and hit a home run, but those lucky swings don't mean that I am a consistently good baseball player. Developing expertise in an area of life has required that I get information from many different sources: books, family and friends, or experts, which made it easier to get past a lack of motivation and keep trying. For example, when I wanted to learn how to cook, I watched cooking shows on cable TV, I read cookbooks, I read magazines about cooking, and I spent time in the kitchen cooking with my mom. The first dinner I ever made was steak with a red pepper sauce and rosemary potatoes. It took hours of reading recipes to find one that would be sophisticated, but not too complicated. I went to the grocery store and asked about different cuts of steak and in the vegetable aisle I carefully inspected many red peppers before selecting a few. My emotional motivation to become a good cook was very high and it got me through the long hours of chopping, dicing, and taste-testing recipes. The joy I felt serving that steak dinner to my parents and my brother was well worth the hours of reading and grocery shopping.
It is natural for it to take time to become good at something and spending a lot of time learning how to master things should not lead people to a lack of motivation. If you feel a lack of motivation after just a few weeks of trying, then try to find a way to have fun with it! Because when you are having fun, then you will naturally want to keep trying and experimenting. For me, it was fun to read through recipes because as I read them, I imagined what it would be like to serve fantastic meals to my loved ones. I had a high emotional motivation because I saw cooking as a means for expressing my love for family and friends. What is NOT fun is all of this pressure to do things right the very first time and it is no wonder that people experience a high lack of motivation to keep on trying. Instead, try to focus on the process of becoming an expert and what being an expert at something means to you (Is it a way to express your love or appreciation? Your creativity?) Start by doing the following: 1. Get as much information as you can on the subject matter. Read books, magazines and blogs, and talk to someone who is already an expert. Reading books will give you a solid foundation on the subject. Magazines tend to use great pictures which provide a visual depth to your learning. Finally, talking to an expert gives you valuable insight into what works for other people. Learning from someone who already knows is a tried-and-true trick. 2. Next, try to do it yourself. Everyone learns by doing and there is no short cut past this step. Depending on what you are trying to master, you could be at step two for weeks, months, or even years. For example, learning how to cook a steak took a couple of hours, but learning how to decorate a cake took many months. But, learning how to be a good listener in order to improve your relationships may take years. 3. Have fun in the process. The more fun you have, the more emotional motivation you will have and the less you will care about how long it takes to become an expert. So, for starters, don't take yourself too seriously. Learn to laugh at your mistakes and be proud of yourself for having the strength to keep trying. The more fun you have, the more you will want to keep trying and the more you try, the better you will become. So, the way I see it, having fun is a sure-fire way to become successful. 4. Share what you are going through with others. Other people will provide different points of view, which will improve your learning process. Plus, when you have a setback and start to experience a lack of motivation, your loved ones will help you remember what is truly important :-)
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